To Have the best morning!

Now to start a great morning we need to get dolled up, yes being in our pj's is tempting and very comfortable but if you want to FEEL good you got to LOOk good. Im not saying to go crazy with it like the Mad Hatter!! :)

Put some pretty make up on, nice dress, heels, and pin up your hair and voila your ready!

And after all that hard work you'll end up classy like this:

-we can wish can't we.

<3 inspiration


*note that this is the sloppiest post yet but I needed to perk up my morning.

Crap

For the past few months I've been so preoccupied with my stupid Starbucks job, that I quit and a failed relationship with my dad. I would have to become very brave and not afraid of being vulnerable or exposed to let you know why I dislike this man with a passion, especially now.
I wish I could tell someone what he did to me that way it didn't seem unexpectedly rude to say "I don't care what happens to that man" or sometimes "hate". All I know is that there are some very lucky girls in this world who get to have a normal relationship with their fathers and get to spend time with them the way it was intended.
I just don't understand what God's purpose was in all of this. They say that he doesn't put anything in your path that you can't handle but what if a semi truck runs you down?! Why would a father betray all moral values and why after we forgave him for it out of no where choose to disown me and want nothing to do with me. IS that really a father or dad or just a sperm donor.
Tears fall from my eyes but not from what he had and has done to me but for what I didn't get to experience or to have. My mother has her father (grandpa) to our house every year for a month or so and it's wonderful that they can do that. That he loves her so much, but not too much and he still tries to give guidance. Some might read this, well if anyone even reads my blog I don't think so, but if they do you might think that oh one day it will be all right. I very much doubt that. I am a twenty-one year old woman and if it's not out of stubbornness then it's from good judgement not to let him back into a life he nearly destroyed. You know this blog may even be better than any therapist I saw. They always have very beady judging eyes. can't stand them :)

Thanks for letting me vent

Girls & Girls

Watching Sex and the City right now and all they are talking about is girl on girl action!
Why is it that everyone (almost everyone) gets off on girls together. But guy on guy action isn't that sexy to the universal person. I guess it's just that a woman's body is so beautiful and I mean every part of them. As where a man's pee pee :P is actually not that attractive. So what is a good fantasy?

Men are just Happier

Men Are Just Happier People
What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you,
He or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough..
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes..
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives
On December 24 in 25 minutes.

NICKNAMES
If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch,
They will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately
Refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and Wildman…
EATING OUT
When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators…
MONEY
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.
BATHROOMS
A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.
The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.
ARGUMENTS
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
FUTURE
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
MARRIAGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
DRESSING UP
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash,
Answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail…
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals…
NATURAL
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
OFFSPRING
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes.
There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!

*it's no fair to women*

When Life happens

Yesterday I had a pretty frustrating morning. First I decided I didn't want my 3DS anymore because well it just wasn't me and so I go back to Game stop to return my $250 purchase. Only to get $136 for it! I couldn't believe it! First of all if I would have known that I would never have bought anything from them. It's absolutely ridiculous but I just wanted my money back. Me and my boyfriend were so mad but eventually calmed down and ate some lunch before he had to go to work.

Then it all came crashing down. He forgot his badge so I told him I was coming back downtown anyways and will bring it to him. Then when I got home I found his phone in my car that he also forgot. So my brother and I decided to walk downtown to get some exercise but I get a call from my mom saying that my boyfriend called her telling her that he got FIRED!! Which is now the reason I hate Hilton and will boycott against them and Game Stop :).

Oh man I turned back around to get to my car and get to where he was a soon as I could. I felt this sense of hurt for him and felt like he needed me. I don't know if he really did but I knew I needed to be with him. So I get there and he has the saddest face ever :(.
Really broke my heart. So yesterday was all about cheering him up and I'm pretty sure he's back on track. As a matter of fact he already got a job working at Jiffy Lube with my two older brothers.

It all seems so surreal and so perfect that he would jump back up on his feet so fast. I think he is truly blessed and I love him. And will always come to his defense. So mama bearish :D.

Something Beautiful today

Let me just say that I really wish I was a dedicated gardener. I would love to see things grow. But maybe my inability to stay focused on one thing for too long inhibits me from doing this. Either way I do enjoy spring and the bright green on the sides of streets. I love the smell of trees and leaves. And flowers are just so beautiful. When did God decide that he will just make a whole lot of different flowers? So here is a picture of something that should bring a good feeling in the soul.

Hard to Find a Motivation

I am pretty sure that a lot of people can relate to this title. I have no idea what it is but whenever the sun comes out I get sleepy and don't want to be out. I don't know whats wrong with me. I don't have the motivation to even write this blog, or clean my room or play my sims. Maybe I am having an off day or off month. Geez I have been out of school for a month and I just couldn't wait to do all these things and now I am complaining on not doing anything. By george we got a problem.

I am thinking that I should change my purpose for this blog though. I am going to work at Starbucks so I thought I might go a little above and beyond and know all the different coffee's to make. I just found out that a macchiato and latte are almost the same thing except that the milk goes first in the macchiato then the coffee and coffee goes in first in a latte and then the milk. You get a strong coffee first taste with a macchiato and then the sweetness of the milk. And of course the latte is just sweet and yummy.

So maybe that's it... that's the answer to all of life's questions, coffee!

Without Words

I haven't posted in a long time. Too long I guess and this is the update. I cheated on my new meal plan of good food. I didn't last long at all, although I have lost 5 pounds and kept it off. I guess all I need to do is stop being lazy and actually get to it right?!
I am in the process of getting a job at the airport, at Starbucks. It's pretty silly but I've always wanted to work there. So it's paying minimum wage but I don't mind. I'll be working an overnight shift, which by the way pays 50 cents more and I AM SO EXCITED!!
Just did my fingerprinting today, I have to say I am glad that they don't put the black ink on our fingers anymore to do that.
The more crazy news of my life can't be exactly told well because I'd have to kill ya :D
Okay not really but the skinny of it goes a little like this. My brother and his baby mama of 3 kids aren't really taking care of their kids instead my dad, which is a not so great dad and his hill billy girlfriend are. I've always didn't like this because It just isn't right. First off that's my dad, my brother is my half brother from my mom so the kids are not even with blood relatives. They have lived in town about 15 mins away and now are deciding to move to the mountains or something and thats about 2 to 3 hours away. NOT SO GREAT right?! Well now we are going through a custody craphole, me and my mom to get these kids with real relatives. Geez my life is crazy and I would get into more details but all that is kind of personal. One main point is that my dad is still married to my mom... dun dun dun!!!
Okay on to the next subject...
Summer!
Other than my job I don't have any other plans. I need ideas. Yesterday i went to a city that is a couple hours away and it was great. Me, my little brother and my boyfriend went to the sea life center. I love the sea lions!! Okay next place would be a 5 hour trip or a 9 hour trip. But really I want to go to California or Washington or even Florida.. I need some real sun in my life!

So it's actually hard

After spending a week just filling up on the food I won't be able to eat anymore, I finally get the time to go on base and get some Healthy food. I was jamming to my music and when I get there I hand the guy my card and he says good day and then tells me to pull over because it's ILLEGAL to have studded tires on base. (side note: I live in Alaska and we have to change over our tires and i guess i missed the dead line) So i pull over not knowing what to do and so frustrated and embarrassed and kind of scared to be honest. I kept thinking they were going to shoot me or something. BUT luckily I got off with a warning but i had to leave base. SO i go home load my tires in the car, go to Johnson's tire service, walk around and find the new Shatter nail polish, and then get my car back. After I unloaded the old tires into the shed I headed back to base, got on without any problems. As you could imagine I was exhausted to I tried so hard to get all the stuff I needed and head out. It turns out when you rush you end up forgetting things UGH!!
So today was DAY ONE and I am so hungry and want fried foods and feel like dying. I am being a little dramatic but not as much as my little brother, he literally sat there and gagged as he ate a ceasar salad w/o dressing. I do admit it did need dressing but he was being a drama QUEEN!!
Today is almost over and i can't wait even though I have 16 more days to do until I can have bread I just want to sleep and not think about the pain in my stomach =/

*HELP ME LORD*

Food; I try to resist

I don't know about you, but getting healthier always means I can't enjoy the foods i love. And i love food. I would marry food if I could, I would let my self be obese except i wouldn't :]
I know that there are a lot of ways to incorporate the foods you like without overdoing it. But it seems to me that I can't get what i love without overdoing it. When was the last time you only ate the serving size in a bag of chips?? been awhile huh. I try so hard but fail all the time. I've even tried wheat pasta and ewwwwww it was gross. SUCH a big change.

Some things I always cut out are
1. Fast Food
2. Junk food
3. Soda (any kind, dark or light)

Those seem to be the only foods that contribute to my weight gain.

Okay all I've been talking about is what's good to get thin. But there are things that matter, like what makes you happy? I went to a counselor some years ago and she figured I was just pessimistic, and I am, so she told me to write down several things that I am grateful for everyday. I did this and I was a lot happier. It actually makes a difference in your life.
Today I am grateful
1. That school is finally over
2. For sleep
3. For utilities, especially water
4. That I have two living parents
5. That my dogs are always happy to see me

These are my dogs. They are King Charles Cavalier Spaniels, and I simply adore them. Kylie is the reddish brown dog, she is 3 years old and Charlie the blenhiem is just barely a year old now. This picture was taken last year when I first got him. I will upload a more recent one of them, I don't have a picture of them together, not good ones anyway. So these are my babies, they often piss me off and bring me joy. I am hoping that Kylie is pregnant (crossing my fingers). Been waiting a long time so that will make me very happy.

Kind of got side tracked there but there are some things that make me smile. Do more of smiling and less of frowning and more likely you'll outlive a turtle :]

Activity: Basketball

Yes today I played some basketball at the school just around the corner with my Mister, who will soon be proposing to me :). Anyway it was so fun and I guess the best part is just laughing at myself and at him for missing or in a shocked way when we make it by throwing it without looking. I am pretty sure this constitutes for a workout I mean i wasn't out there for an hour but I felt so exhausted by the time I was done I barely had the energy to throw a free throw, which is very serious.

I guess my love for basketball started with this movie (shown above). Love and basketball, I first saw it in middle school and fell in love with "Q" (omar epps) Which is quite silly now because I do not find him attractive. I just loved the story of how a boy and girl grew up together and ended up with one another. What a fairy tale right?!
Anyway I played in high school my freshman year, ended up on the JV team and was a starting five player. Another BIG deal. I would have been in varsity the next year but my mom got sick, and well that's another story. But even though i still do love throwing that ball and crossing my fingers it makes it in. To my surprise every time I do make it in I always blame it on luck. :] but i know i must have some skill.
I wonder what tomorrows activity will be? Maybe I should start with some real deep SPRING CLEANING!

Tools

You can't just jump into getting healthier without having some tools to guide and help you. Now I do not have a home gym or a gym membership, which by the way I think is a complete waste of money, but I do have some tools to get me started.
(1) An aerobic step

(2) 5 pound dumbbell

(2) 10 pound kettle bells

(1) yoga mat

A couple of DVD workout videos: Kim Kardashians: Fit into your jeans by Friday, Yoga with Gaiam, Tai chi with Gaiam.

To be honest whatever you choose would be great as long as you enjoy doing them and they are a little challenging.

ALL this exercising would mean nothing if we just pig out every night, so unfortunately we need to cut sweets. OH NO!! Almost seems impossible but how i see it is once I lose this 20 pounds and get my body looking sexy :) then that's when I'll add those sweets back in.
To help with this eating plan not diet! I must exaggerate that it is NOT a diet just a way to trick your body into losing weight and burning more fat with the foods we eat.
I bought a book from Barnes and Noble's top book picks! Weird because I've never done that but this book is awesome!

Now although it sounds like it's only 17 days, it's not. It's actually 4 intervals of 17 days and I read through the first 3 chapters and it seems promising. The first cycle is called Accelerate. In this portion I can have unlimited protein (which I don't get enough of and meat is a good source that I really don't like to begin with) and vegetables and fruits. Carbohydrates and sweets are cut out completely so like I said I WILL GET MY DONUTS at some point :)

Alrighty so those are some of my tools that I am going to use. I hope I have the strength to do this.

Blogging

Blogging is something totally new and exciting for me. I am not too sure where to start out or what to even write about. So up until now I have just been posting whatever was on my mind. As it turns out some blogs have points to them :). So here I go again searching the meaning of a blog. I currently have tons of time on my hands and that may inspire the blog. With a whole summer to do whatever I want I have to decided to get healthy.

Yes healthy and I mean a complete renovation of my life. That means healthy body and healthy mind. Just like many americans I am too worried with life's little stressors and tend to be on the "cup half empty" side of the street. To be happy means to be successful so in the end I will be all that and more.
My main motivation for this is because I've gained 20 lbs since last year. OMG yes 20 pounds!! It really freaks me out that i had to buy size 14 jeans when I used to wear size 11. You know when you sit and you can feel a roll pinching. GEEZ I loathe that feeling. So here I am to rid of it for good.

Fitness Magazine and Shape Magazine are going to be my tools this summer to getting healthy. If you haven't ever read these magazines, well you should. It doesn't only talk about exercising, but also about great foods and beauty health tips.
I don't know about you guys but I want to look like Sofia Vergara if I can. I really want to be confident enough to take my jacket off and feel sexy. So women, if you want to feel sexy , lets get to it!

Rain

There is something absolutely beautiful about rain. I love the smell and the look of it. Most people love sunny days, as do I, but i love a good rainy day. And when there is thunder it just adds to the romance of it all. Lightning completes the date as well..
It rained last night and i woke up wondering if all the bad had been washed away. Can it be washed away? I walked around getting ready this morning believing it was perfect, the sun shinning through the grey clouds and nothing was wrong. And then you get news of people getting raped, people dying, people lying and cheating and you realize that nothing is washed away. God, or who ever you want to believe made it rain, did it so we could believe in this new day, through a new lens of life. BEAUTIFUL rain!

My favorite Artist in Alaska

Katy Sevigny art is so vibrant and beautiful

I especially love her sea life paintings.


You can see the rest of it at www.katiesevignyart.org

Hope you enjoy

Rome around the corner

So it isn't like I am going there this year or anything. But my point here is to say that I WILL! No matter how long (though i hope not too long) or how much i have to work. I will get there.
We can only go as far as we let ourselves go.

So what do I need to do to get there?

Death

Yesterday I found out that my astronomy teacher from high school passed away. Mr Brabec, he was indeed one of my favorite teachers. I remember going home after the first day of school and telling my mom about all my teachers (I still do this even now that I am in college) and my description was this,
" he has beach blonde hair almost touching his shoulders but bald on the top, he wears glasses and earrings and he is always smiling".
That last part almost makes me want to cry "always smiling", is he not smiling anymore? It's a weird thought to think that he died yesterday and yet the world kept on spinning, kept on living, just kept on. Is that what death is just a period to the end of someones story? Is it at all that simple. How do you grieve something like this. I remember him telling me that one day my hair looked good :) and the day I was broken up with and couldn't stop crying, he let me sit outside of class. He had a heart and he had a family.
My theory is that no one really leaves this existence because stories like this one keep them alive and as long as I keep telling it he won't be out of existence and into some empty space. I am a religious person and do believe in God but not everyone does and I don't even know if he did. So that is why I say existence because I have to believe that everyone at least believes we are in that.

To Complete my happiness

1. Coffee- and it matters where its from. Burnt coffee is gross and too sweet is unbearable. Starbucks is my favorite BUT there are local coffee stands that make it perfecto!

2. Dreams- they need to be realistic. I would like to breathe underwater but that might never happen and my dream to travel the world, although very optimistic, it will take time and dedication.

3. Love- that unbearable to be apart that love to stay in your arms and breathe the same air as you, love. What is life without love?!

4. Hot showers- Nothing more relaxing or refreshing and maybe even sexy!!

My list could go forever ...

Be happy Dammit

Definitely feel greatful many things in my life. For love, for the sun, for life, for coffee (especially) and my mother.
I hope people aren't taking those great parents for granted because they may not always be there.
And know that being greatful every day for something will prolong your life. So smile, say Thankyou and don't sweat the small shit!

(300) days to smile

posted from Bloggeroid

posted from Bloggeroid

two sides of the coin

There are people here and there, who's lives are utterly amazing. Like how do you get a life so amazing? How can you go to college and be a ski champion?? How can anyone in college fit into their jeans??? That I think I'll never know. Exercising doesn't help and neither does starving yourself.. and packing lunch is a nightmare.
So how do you guys have amazing lives and I feel so plain so simple and I know that's not me?
There are people who actually spend their time on their blogs write beautiful poetry or wonderful stories and for a moment I imagine I am them.
I adopted an elephant from Thailand and I can write stories that make people giggle. I am a food loving guru. How do you achieve all this?! It is a stabbing agonizing pain to have to go to school everyday, learn about chemistry when I know I'll never want to use it in life?
IS wanting to be a nurse common?? I want to help people, isn't that noble in some way? I love helping people. I don't want to be common or simple.
Although I know I want those simple pleasures in life marriage kids and a beautiful home. I think what I really want is to be a DOUBLE AGENT. That is absolutely the only way I'll ever get two sides of the coin. Live on the edge

Long day

Today has gone fairly well considering I had no sleep and had to be up early for my 10 hour school day. These days are most interesting because it starts with the chemistry professor who wears long skirts with huge snow boarding boots and she must only be 5'4. She also has the tendency to use her body as an example as an atom or molecule. Then its on to human anatomy lecture where the male professor talks so quiet but he is a intelligent man. In that class there are so many people I wonder how many of us are tied to one another .. there is a tall butch woman, who I don't like much because she likes to shush people... she always wears her hair in pig tail braids.. I guess its the hair that bothers me so.
And that's half the day.. I go on to a two and a half hour bio lab then another two and a half nutrition class which is is fun because my professor makes faces similar to my niece..
Currently I'm in the last class waiting for it to be over.. but it won't be.. busy days always make me want to do more.. problem is I never get anything done...
So now I need to pay attention.

posted from Bloggeroid

What on Earth?!

All morning CNN has been on and so often I have looked up from my computer to catch sentences between my chemistry assignments. So another war? More expensive gas  ( good thing I filled up already).
To be honest I hate watching TV especially the news because it's people and THEIR opinions so you don't ever get the full story.

When did it become okay for us to just bomb places? when people thought it was okay to bomb us I guess... So you pushed me and I'll push you back... pointless
And I'm not here expressing any political opinions .. I'm just here wishing we didn't live in this kind of world..

Worldy Things

We live in such a self conscious world. For example I was at the gym and in the locker room you see women constantly going to the mirror and checking out themselves and their outfits ( I admit I do it too). I mean come on we are only here to sweat, don't try to look cute, you won't achieve that. I hate that we live in a world where that is all we are "superficial". Every where I turn I am pressured to eat LESS, wiegh LESS, and be LESS. When I say eat less I mean I don't get to enjoy food the way I want to or eat the really good stuff. Wiegh less means that I have to be lean and beautiful to fit that society accepting look. And be less means that I should be a lady and not talk to loud or make to much noise.
-I don't know if any of that makes sense but that is how I see the world.

Today I read that one of my friends who is 22 achieved her goal of making as much as an RN just by experience by being a child support caseworker. It saddens me because I want to be a RN and I am currently in school for it. I have no income because I'm living off of my scholarships at the moment. And to keep my GPA up to maintain my scholarships I spend vast amounts of time studying. Anyways I'm not sure how to feel about that... Do I achieve higher?? Reach for the stars and all that jazz.

Green day

So as I am sitting in the kitchen with my sister in laws .. drinking some cranberry drink ... I decide I want to make green frosting. The result: a beautiful creation

posted from Bloggeroid

Test Anxiety

This is how I am constantly feeling before exams..

posted from Bloggeroid

Searching...

Here I am at Barnes & Noble searching for some inspiration and of  course looking at the cookbooks. I was initially looking for Italian cookbooks and ended up seeing the one from Julie and Julia "Mastering the Art of French Cooking" By Julia Child. I skimmed it only to see a lot of little writing and no pictures. Yes I am the type of person that needs the pictures otherwise I won't know if my food looks right.
Anyways after dropping an Italian cookbook that weighed 30 pounds I look at the bookcase across which was the wedding section. Wedding books, planning books on how to get hitched. I can't wait for my special day *imagining it*

So at the very bottom there were etiquette books and I picked one up that said "How to be a Lady". "A lady never dates out of desperation" Oh my goodness why would you?! "A lady never corrects others on their grammar". Wow I do this all the time, does this mean I am not a lady? I guess I shouldn't do that but I can't help to think that the person I'm correcting is going to go around and contintuously embarrassing themselves. Is this book for the women back in the fifties?
-Why are there so many etiquette rules and no one follows them? And should we?
My #1 etiquette rule would have to be "Say thank you"
 There are so many people who fail at this everyday. Not only at saying thank you but the other person saying "you're welcome" Both of these are essential things and should be used every single day.

Simply Stated

Name: Sonya
Age: 20
Currently: In a relationship & a college student

I have never written a blog and often find it hard to come up with words to say that will be meaningful, I guess i want it to mean something and not a boring "I love doggies" You know how people write on Facebook... it annoys me so much.
Anyways I'm attempting to do this and in the dining hall at my university where it feel like a million eyes are watching me (ever get that feeling?)...

I could no more be in a more confusing time in my life.

Today I'm stuck in a weird phase where I don't know what I want to do with my life and constantly feel like I'm wasting it and taking it for granted. I need some kind of intervention for the perfectionist and boring person that I am...
So every so often I try to spice it up. Yeah that is a horrible idea for me because it always makes me feel stupid. Recently I had "brownies" if you know what I mean and it was the scariest and worst feeling EVER. My advice to people on that is just say no, a natural high is 10x better and there are no side effects.

I created this blog about 5 hours ago and didn't write right away because I feel like there should be a point to it. While I pondered on that I read about Buddhism (random I know) and wondered how other religions are like. So I thought maybe I will talk about that :]
Who knows I'll just see where this takes me.